Dave is Stunned
I stared into the mirror for what seemed to be hours, yet must have only been days. I looked at myself in almost every angle imaginable ... including the dreaded "up the nose" angle thinking I might find some reminents of a beard on my thrid or fourth chin. But no, no such luck, it was gone, GONE I SAY!
I was now in denial. DENIAL I say! Do you hear me, I am in denial! There's no way! Look at my wonderful lips without any "fluff" around them?! I mean, is this right? How am I suposed to hide any scraps of food or drink for later?!
It cannot be! I must have facial hair! I know, my eyes are not working correctly this day! Yes, that must be it! Wait, feel the face! Yes, that's it, you have temporary beard-blindness (TBB, comonly known as "your completely nuts"). Yep, that must be ... NO, *gasp* that's not it!
Oh I know, my eyes and my hands aren't working! Yes, my eyes have TBB, and my hands have LMNOQ! Of course, everyone knows the common cure to LMNOQ is to pinch your skin! Yes, that'll do it ... ACK! Still nothing there ...
Ya' now, I really am unhappy. Everything I have tried shows me that I have no more facial hair. It took me years to make myself look like, like, *gasp* where are the pictures of me with my wonderful beard?
Hey, wait a cott'en-pick'en-moment! Just take a look at me for a moment! Ahh, yes, I look Mahvelous!
